Life has a Story

Once when talking with a friend, he stopped mid-sentence, stared, and said, "You have a story for everything, don't you?" His questioned caught me off guard! But I thought about it for a second and replied back, "Yes. I do." We both laughed and continued our conversation. That was over fourteen years ago and I realize many of these stories have never really been documented. My goal for my blog the next few months is to provide all of you the random stories from my life. Hopefully you find as my joy and humor or tenderness in them as I did in living them.

Doubt Not, Fear Not

Right now I should be preparing for an interview with a company that actually excites me. As much as I should be focusing my energy there or even finishing a final project for my other job, my mind continues pondering over thoughts I had while working out this morning. Time to data dump if only to help my mind more fully understand the swirling thoughts.

One of the greatest gifts we receive from our Heavenly Father is personal revelation. Through the gift of the Holy Ghost and the power of the atonement, the Lord is able to direct our lives in a uniquely personal way. Insights, impressions, and instruction come when we earnestly seek the will of the Lord.

In my lifetime, I have had such experiences. Some so sacred I have either never discussed them in detail or never mentioned them at all. Most often they came while experiencing what Elder Holland referred to as our own Liberty Jails. Recently, as I was seeking the Lord's will for me, I once again experienced the sweet divine gift of personal revelation. The topic nor the message is what my mind has been mulling over the past few hours. What stood out to me was what happened afterward.

Opposition comes in all forms. Though I knew exactly what I felt, advice from the world caused me to doubt. I began to cast off the insights, impressions, and instruction. I called myself crazy. I lost confidence. I completely crumbled. What happened? I let others' stories predict my life for me. I let the world's perspective question the knowledge I received from a loving Heavenly Father. I let the adversary confuse me to the point I was ready to forgo all that had been revealed to me.

Thankfully, the Lord heard my prayers and cast the darkness out of my life. As the light flooded my soul, I began to more fully understand the principle of trusting in the Lord. Where doubt and fear, which are the seeds of darkness, are present trust, faith, and hope cannot exist. Helaman 5:41 explains just this. "You must repent, and cry unto the voice, even until you shall have faith in Christ...and when ye shall do this, the cloud of darkness shall be removed from overshadowing you." And from D&C 6:36: "Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not." Asking others for advice or seeking out what seems "normal" destroys the very gift of personal revelation. What the Lord speaks to us is far more valuable than anything that we may try to glean from the perspective of the world.

What are my conclusions from all this rambling? First, the Lord desires to impart His wisdom and will for us daily. Second, opposition comes in all forms. Third, doubt and fear will cause us to question that which we have received and believed and lived for. Fourth, having trust, faith, and hope, even if I feel a bit crazy, brings far greater joy and happiness in my life then listening to the wisdom of the world. Fifth, my brother-in-law was right.

Time to grade papers and prepare for an interview!

Quote of the Day

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.

-Helen Keller

Scientific Evidence

Having a month long focus on gratitude helped me in an uncertain time. Focusing on the good that happened helped shift my mind towards all the positive in my life. Today the Wall Street Journal published an article detailing the scientific evidence found in those who express gratitude.

"A growing body of research suggests that maintaining an attitude of gratitude can improve psychological, emotional and physical well-being. Adults who frequently feel grateful have more energy, more optimism, more social connections and more happiness than those who do not, according to studies conducted over the past decade.

Studies show that using negative, derogatory words—even as you talk to yourself—can darken your mood as well. Fill your head with positive thoughts, express thanks and encouragement aloud and look for something to be grateful for, not criticize, in those around you, especially loved ones."

The article continues with the benefits of gratitude in children and how we can cultivate gratitude in our lives. I highly recommend the read.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704243904575630541486290052.html

Gratitude Day 30

1- Exercise. I haven't consistently worked out since my half marathon in August. Today I recommitted to a routine. It felt good to get my heart pumping and my legs moving. Hopefully I'll be able to complete a few more races this year including another half marathon with my sisters.

2- Modern Medicine. I am extremely grateful my sister and her new husband were in the United States when he went into emergency surgery for appendicitis. Yes you read that correctly. Three days after they got married, the day they were supposed to fly to Costa Rica for their honeymoon, he was wheeled into surgery. However, the bright spot is their honeymoon will only be delayed one week.

3- Surviving. I look back on my life and realize how many times I have been in uncertain situations with what seemed like insurmountable obstacles. My mom once commented to me that during those times in life we may need to face each day in five minute intervals. Though I haven't had a trial like that in years, I have been reminded how vulnerable I am and how completely reliant I am on the Lord. November did not play out the way I expected in October. But through the divine grace and mercy of the Lord and an exceptional family, I survived.

Gratitude Day 29

1- Job possibilities. I found two new jobs today that could actually be a great fit for me. Both are with a nonprofit educational foundation. One is a trainer designer which basically works with the product team to develop training solutions that help educators improve student outcomes. The other is an educational consultant who interfaces with the customer and the product team to improve the plan and design of the product and the best way to train customers on the product. Yes they sound very similar except the first focuses on the business end and the second on the curriculum end. Lucky for me, I have the background for both.

2- MBA friends. When I was first considering the program, I asked a current student one reason why he would recommend it. He remarked that you get to go to school with 150 of your best friends. I didn't realize how true his statement was until today. One girl who I became good friends with emailed me today. I hadn't spoken with her since graduation. I was reminded how important these friendships are to me and that i need to do better in staying in touch with them.

3- Not commuting. Today I am grateful I did not have to commute to work. I remember all the snow days I had driving to and from my schools. The weatherman would predict a minor storm and it would pound us much like it did last night. Once the new year starts, I know I'll be picking up a commute of some kind. But today, I didn't have to drive in the snow.

Gratitude Day 28

1- Relaxing. Yesterday was busy with all the traveling between the wedding and reception so it was nice to relax today. Regroup. Unwind. Rest. Very much needed.

2- Coming home to a clean apartment. I arrived home around midnight last night. Knowing my apartment was clean when I came home was a nice feeling. Yes I know I spent the "blizzard" day cleaning and already knew that everything was in order, but I was still grateful to come home to an organized, vacuumed, and scrubbed down apartment.

3- Afternoon church. Usually I don't like afternoon church; however, as I said above, I needed a relaxing day. So, today I am grateful I was able to sleep in without worrying about any meetings or rushing off to church, especially with the few inches of snow on the ground.

More Pictures of the Wedding

I didn't take many pictures at the wedding because my three brother-in-laws and my older brother were doing a great job. I know many of you who follow my blog also know my sister so I thought I would upload a couple of pictures from the wedding. These two came from Lucille's blog.

Gratitude Day 27

1- Eternal Marriage. Today my sister and her fiance were married in the temple for all eternity. The sealing powers we have on this earth create a bright future of hope which promises that if we are true and faithful, we can live with our spouse, children, and families for all eternity. What an amazing blessing from the Lord!

2- Relationships with others. At the reception this evening, I was reminded of how important kindness towards others is in building friendships with everyone. My great-aunt and my dad's cousin both made comments about how much they value the efforts I give in visiting with them. Most people do not know their extended family beyond first cousins and aunts and uncles, but I have had the unique chance to get to know these relatives because I grew up in the same town as them. Having these extended, extended relatives in my life has been a great blessing to me.

3- Angelic ministers. With today being such a busy day and my mind being elsewhere most of the time, I am grateful the Lord is able to speak to others to help me. My aunt related an experience that happened to her during the ceremony that related to me. Her impression lifted my spirits and renewed my hope.

Gratitude Day 26

1- Siblings who recognize what I need especially when I don't want to burden them or when I am purposefully avoiding/hiding what I know I need. I truly have generous and kind siblings (and in-laws).

2- Nieces and Nephews. Many years ago, one of my nephews asked with concern in his voice why I didn't have kids. I told him that I needed to be married first and jokingly asked him if he knew of anyone. His four-year-old mind raced and replied with a sad voice that he couldn't think of anyone. He was quiet for a few more moments, then said to me with a wisdom beyond his years that he and his siblings would be my kids until I had my own. I have enjoyed playing with all eighteen of my "kids" this week. They have been a joy and a blessing to me. I am also grateful that they all seem to get along with one another. Every one of them has a cousin they consider a friend.

3- Having fun. I love the variety of interests in my family. If you were a fly on the wall in my house this week, you would have seen people playing video games, chess, card games, board games, watching and playing football and basketball, singing around the piano, playing the piano/guitar/trumpet, talking about a wide variety of topics including politics, religion, medicine, business, sports, etc., and loving every minute of it. I am grateful for a family that enjoys being together.

Gratitude Day 25

1- Sleeping in. Usually we go to my aunt's house for Thanksgiving. This year all of my siblings were in town and we had Thanksgiving at my parents' house. Joyous day because I was able to sleep in! I really enjoyed not having to travel back and forth this year.

2- Financial security. Even though I do not have a full time job yet, it is comforting to know I am financially secure. I followed the philosophy of "live like a student while you are student" the past few years. Even though I was used to a steady income before graduate school, cutting back while in school has saved me from many headaches.

3- Comfort of family. We all have our family stories and mine is not immune. Despite this, they are a comfort to me. I appreciate their counsel, their perspective, and their love. My life has never been "normal". For some reason the most random or unexpected experiences happen to me. Because of this, they have never failed to support me in my decisions. I truly am blessed to be part of my family.

Gratitude Day 24

1- Artwork. Today I enjoyed the works of a great painter with my family. I thoroughly enjoyed the exhibit and hope to go back. Though I'm not the most knowledgeable about art history, I am grateful my parents taught me to appreciate and enjoy the talents of painters and other artists.

2- Pampering. Few things in this world relax me like a foot massage. Today I indulged and got a pedicure at my favorite place. Some may scoff asking, "Why would you pay money to have someone paint your toenails?" For those of you who have had a pedicure, you know it has nothing to do with the toe paint. It is all about the massage. Very, very nice!

3- Shopping with a friend. A friend of mine invited me to go shoe shopping with her today. Though I'm not a big shopper, I enjoyed my time being out of the house and talking with a friend. I did make a purchase: jewelry for my sister's wedding. As a previous post attests, I already found a pair of shoes. :)

Gratitude Day 23

1- O Holy Night. Whenever I hear this song, my mind recalls sitting by the Christmas tree wrapped in a blanket, watching the twinkling Christmas lights, and listening to this song. For me that was Christmas. The peace and stillness that seemed lost at other times of the year. Many versions of this song exist but I discovered my favorite two years ago. A good friend of mine introduced me to this version as we were decorating the Christmas tree. The spirit that accompanied the song as it filled the room was unmatched and I fell in love with it all over again. Hauntingly beautiful rendition. The King's Singers have forever solidified this as my favorite Christmas song.



2- Clean apartment. My morning appointment was canceled so I spent the time deep cleaning my bathroom and bedroom.

3- Freshly washed sheets. Not only did I get my apartment cleaned but I also finished my laundry. Another great feeling. I had to do something today. My afternoon plans were foiled by this weak "blizzard" that everyone got hyped up about.

Gratitude Day 22

1- My dry cleaning place. When I taught at Bingham High, I found this great little dry cleaning shop. Each article is only $2.50 and they do a fantastic job! Living thirty minutes away does not make it convenient to take advantage of these great prices so I have to be strategic in my dry cleaning planning. Today I had to pick up a friend at the airport and Saturday I'm in Salt Lake for my sister's wedding reception which made it a perfect opportunity to drop off my increasing pile of dry cleaning.

2- Broadway music. I absolutely love Broadway music. Ironically, I have never been to New York but I hope to remedy that one day. Some of my favorite music comes from Ragtime, Wicked, The Scarlet Pimpernel, and The Secret Garden. Of course, I have other musicals I enjoy too, but specific favorite songs come from the aforementioned list. Uplifting music is hard to find these days but my Broadway playlist never disappoints me.

3- My older brother. As a child, Rich and I didn't have that much in common, but now that we have both grown up, we get along very well. Last night we talked about different sports teams, teased one another, and laughed about some things online. He really is a great brother who always supports me.

Rest of the story

I thought I would expound on the post from yesterday. The sister who spoke on trusting in the Lord related her difficulties in getting pregnant. She and her husband have spent years trying to have a family and she had even received a blessing promising her that she would have children. Even though my topic was tithing, I felt impressed to talk about faith in the Lord and His promised blessings; essentially, obeying the law of tithing helps us qualify for those blessings. I did not end my talk with a story about the miracle that happened to someone for paying tithing, but with the story of Rachel from the Old Testament which Elder Condie related in General Conference a few years ago and that I have referenced before in this blog:

With ever-increasing envy and mounting desperation, one day Rachel explosively demanded of Jacob, “Give me children, or else I die” (Genesis 30:1). Leah subsequently bore two more sons and a daughter.

In this age of one-hour dry cleaning and one-minute fast-food franchises, it may at times seem to us as though a loving Heavenly Father has misplaced our precious promises or He has put them on hold or filed them under the wrong name. Such were the feelings of Rachel.

But with the passage of time, we encounter four of the most beautiful words in holy writ: “And God remembered Rachel” (Genesis 30:22). And she was blessed with the birth of Joseph and later the birth of Benjamin. There are millions on earth today who are descendants of Joseph who have embraced the Abrahamic promise that through their efforts “shall all the families of the earth be blessed, even with the blessings of the Gospel, which are the blessings of salvation, even of life eternal” (Abraham 2:11).

When heaven’s promises sometimes seem afar off, I pray that each of us will embrace these exceeding great and precious promises and never let go. And just as God remembered Rachel, God will remember you.

I felt the Lord's hand in helping me prepare this talk. On the surface, this story has nothing to do with tithing, but it does have everything to do with the Lord fulfilling His promises to those who are faithful. I could not have known the speaker before me would speak about her struggles with getting pregnant or the promises she had received in priesthood blessings. It was a tender mercy in my life to realize I had been instrument in the hands of the Lord that day.

Gratitude Day 21

1- Friendly faces. I was hoping my brother and sister-in-law would make it to my ward for church. I needed to see a friendly face in the audience. They basically drove all night to make it to church on time but how grateful I am they did that for me. I needed it more than they will ever know.

2- Validation. I felt my talk went well and the audience was listening. However, I really appreciated the comments I received afterward from ward members about their reaction to the message. I was nervous but the kind comments alleviated that fear.

3- Inspiration. The sister before me talked about trusting in the Lord. Her message resonated with me in many ways and even made me cry. When I was finished with mine, she expressed the same thoughts and emotions. We both needed to hear the other speak and only the Lord would have known how to prompt each of us to say what we did.

Gratitude Day 20

1- Faith. As I've been reading and preparing my talk on tithing, I've realized how important faith is to all our decisions. Obedience to the commandments of the Lord rests on our faith in His promises and His timing. Ultimately, our faith resides in the atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ and His power to save us in whatever earthly circumstance we may find ourselves.

2- Costco. Do I really need to explain this one? Anything worthwhile can be found at Costco. 'Nuff said.

3- Musical talent. I am grateful for my mom who pushed me and pestered me and persisted to help me develop my piano talent. Tonight the ward choir director asked me about my sight reading skills. Because of a fabulous piano teacher and a diligent mom, I knew I would have no trouble learning the music. I love playing the piano now. It brings joy to my soul.

Gratitude Day 19

1- Beautiful Utah Sunsets. If you haven't taken a step outside recently, you have been missing the wonders of God's creation. As the sun sets, the skies fill with a rainbow of pinks and oranges mixed with blues. The light then shines brightly on the snow-capped mountains creating a magnificent sight. Amazingly beautiful!

2- My car. My Honda Accord is almost eleven years old and she still treats me well. I haven't had any major catastrophes with her. She has driven from Phoenix to Utah and back. Also on the list are Las Vegas, Southern California, Northern California, commuting for five years, and all sorts of back road adventures. Today I calculated and discovered I was getting 33-34 miles per gallon! Wahoo! I really do have a great car.

3- The Unexpected. The subtitle on my blog reads "The unexpected changes our lives." I am amazed at how my best laid plans fall apart. Seriously?! I can be so careful and meticulous and life intervenes to create a wonderful chaotic uncertainty. That happened tonight. Without going into details, I'll just say that my plan was perfect but fate intervened. At least I am sitting here smiling and laughing because only something like that would happen to me. Oh Unexpected. How grateful I am that you are part of my life. You keep me laughing and keep stretching me to help me become better than I currently am now.

Quote of the Day

We're surrounded by people who are busy getting their ducks in a row, waiting for just the right moment...

Getting your ducks in a row is a fine thing to do. But deciding what you are you going to do with that duck is a far more important issue.

--Seth Godin (Marketing guru)

Gratitude Day 18

1- Twins. I love my sister's twins! They are adorable and vivacious and passionate and social and...well you get the idea. I had to drop some keys off at my sister's place today. When the twins saw me they got huge smiles, shouted my name, and gave me huge two-year-old hugs. Those two cuties brightened my day today.

2- Bed, Bath, and Beyond coupons. I've been buying a few things there recently (my sister is getting married in a week and is registered there) and having a 20% off coupon for each item saves me lots of money.

3- Random encounters. I swapped shifts with a sister at the temple. Tonight I ran into an MBA friend, my cousin Tim and his wife, and friends from my singles ward. Always good to meet up with people.