Do you remember what was happening this time last year? I do. Keenly aware. I would categorize it as one of the most difficult times of my life. To say I was vulnerable would be an understatement. Uncertain. Shattered. Petrified. Lost. Those would be more accurate descriptions. Only a few saw that side. The rest of you saw me playing a part. Strong. Hopeful. Determined. But I was a wreck. Vulnerability was out the door. I was done and had no idea how I was going to do each day.
That experience taught me about my own strength and the miraculous timing of the Lord. Recently, the Lord has shown me once again that He does hear my prayers and answers come in the most unforeseen ways. (Though I would love to provide all the details now, I'm a bit superstitious and don't want to jinx any situation or outcome so please forgive the vague explanation.)
I actually find myself in a parallel circumstance to last year. No, the world is not coming to an end. But I am faced with something that I'm cautiously optimistic about. Like the job opportunity, this situation isn't playing out in any normal or typical fashion. Good things happen, then waiting. More good things happen, and then more waiting. My expectations of what I think should happen and when things should happen have all been thrown out the window and surprisingly, I feel peace about that. And that's what scares me. I feel peace about not knowing the outcome. So bring on the vulnerability and the unknown amounts of waiting. One day it will all come together. In preparation for that, I'm suiting up like Calvin, because "something could happen today and if anything does, by golly, I'm going to be ready for it!" The Lord is in charge and somehow, in His own way and His own timing, miracles will occur.
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